11/8/08

Fortune, el comando de las galletas...

Hace unos dias vengo jugando con el comando fortune, que busca en la GIGANTESCA database de dichos y frases que tiene, y tira una al azar. Tambien me baje el paquete de fortunas ofensivas (aclaro que el 10% de las ofensivas en español son feministas), y cuando le hice un cat al archivo /usr/share/games/fortunes/off/feministas.fortunes no podia leer nada, estaba como encryptado. Hace unos meses jugando en /usr/games/ encontre un binario que rotaba los characters acordadno con el abecedario, este era rot13, asi que hice un "cat feministas.fortunes | rot13" y obtuve un resultado legible.
Aca expongo algunas de las mejores que encontre (no escribi ninguna de estas, son todas propiedad de fortune):


<cell> apt sex
<apt> sex is probably updatedb; locate; talk; date; cd; unzip; strip; look;
  touch; finger; head; mount; fsck; more; yes; yes; umount; make clean;
  sleep
<rst2003> is there a female equivalent of that command line?
<lazarus> RST2003: sleep :)
  -- in #debian

No, I'd rather look for porn.

  -- Debian Project Leader Martin Michlmayr, when asked to do some real work.

< ore> God uses GNOME?
< joshk> no wonder it rains so often
< ore> "Dammit, those damn heaven's gates won't open, gconfd crashed again"
  -- in #debian-devel

This is a scsi driver, scraes the shit out of me, therefore I tapdanced
and wrote a unix clone around it (C) by linus
-- Somewhere in the kernel tree

<doogie_> linux takes shit and turns it into something useful.
<doogie_> windows takes something useful and turns it into shit

La vida es como windows ... cualquier día te cabe

Mi HD tiene 100K de bad-sector y 130M de bad-windows.
-- Www.frases.com.

Unix is mature OS, windows is still in diapers and they smell badly.
-- Rafael Skodlar <raffi@linwin.com>

<nonlinear> .net is microsofts perverted version of a java networked environment uglified for windows-specific crap

Computers are like air conditioners. Both stop working, if you open windows.
-- Adam Heath

Q: How do you make a blonde's eyes light up?
A: Shine a flashlight in her ear.

'Mounting' is used for three things: climbing on a horse, linking in a
hard disk unit in data systems, and, well, mounting during sex.
-- Christa Keil

X-rated movies are all alike ... the only thing they leave to the
imagination is the plot.

Virgen María: tú que concebiste sin pecar, hazme pecar sin concebir.

PD: Windows 95/98 eran buenos!